Ordinary Days
There are teachers to applaud us for a job well done or coaches to speak with pride for our work ethic. Now, there is simply the work and an internal satisfaction at a job well done.
Hey Friend,
The spring air is beckoning. The smell of damp earth and freshly sprung grass rising to my nose as I stand with my coffee on the back porch. The gentle bring stirring the baby leaves on the trees. The sun casting an orange glow through the clouds layered on the horizon. I paused here this morning.
Then, I walked back inside and sat down to prepare our taxes. With spring luring me outside, this task feels claustrophobically indoors. It’s a mundane task. One that is simply fine. Although, if I’m confessing I feel like a A+ pupil when I get things in order. Our accountant is a man of few words, but I like to think he’s proud of me for making his life simpler. That he likes me just a teensy bit more than other clients because I have things buttoned up.
But, if I’m being honest, I’m beginning to realize there are no rewards for being the best anymore. There are teachers to applaud us for a job well done or coaches to speak with pride for our work ethic. Now, there is simply the work and an internal satisfaction at a job well done.
I feel seen when Michael thanks me for doing the dishes and I try to show my gratitude when he picks up the sticks in the yard. But, it’s certainly not something we say on the 5th load of dishes for the week or the 3rd time picking up sticks this week. These are simply tasks we do. Day in and day out.
The saying about life happening in the ordinary moments rings more and more true the older I get. I’ve only just realized these past few years that there are daily tasks that will live on my to-do list forever. They are not ever fully complete. One load of laundry done or sweep of the floor is simply the act for the day. They will need done tomorrow and the next day too. This is not what I imagined of adulthood.
This first recognition of the never ending cycle shook me to my core. Disappointment settled into my bones. Frustration pulsed within me as I wanted these mundane tasks to simple be done. Complete.
And yet, that is not how the ordinary things of life work. They reappear day after day. Asking for the slightest of attention. Sometimes I give to them with delight, feeling settled into a rhythm and content with myself and the chore at hand. Sometimes I curse the sight of the laundry, the dishes, the plants needing watering. I am angry, or saddened, or frustrated. And in their complete disregard for my feelings they still ask for my attention. Quietly remaining steadfast in their resilience to remain.
There are always more papers to file, more trash to take out, more sweeping to do. They fill my days. I am trying to delight more in the ordinary. Thankful for their consistent presence. Their [these tasks] needs’ are dependable if nothing else.
I feel more accomplished with the monthly and quarterly tasks on my list. The taxes that need done, the cleaning of the dishwasher and washing machine, the washing of the windows, preparing the garden with new soil, oiling the butcher block counters. These chores feel more satisfying. Atleast they only adorn my calendar every month or so. They don’t beckon to me day after day after day.
I am trying to delight more in the ordinary. To enjoy loading the dishwasher just a tiny bit more. Or atleast be thankful for my coffee making routine built around unloading and loading the dishwasher. My patiently waiting french press offering a cozy treat for a job well done. External praise silent. Internal satisfaction content.
In a culture praising accomplishments and focused on productivity these ordinary tasks fade into the background. They may be referred to as habits and any acknowledgement of these chores is full of shameful language of how we should be doing these tasks better, with more efficiency in a more productive way. But, I don’t want to speak harshly of these tasks.
Yes, they annoy me sometimes, but I spend so much of life doing these ordinary things that I want to enjoy them. I don’t want to be more productive with them. I want to soften and be present with them and with the feelings they induce. I won’t always be happy or content doing these things, but I think noticing my feeling and being aware of my emotions while doing these tasks is a part of the lesson they offer me. Consistency, presence, and noticing. These are the lessons everyday chores are revealing to me lately.
These moments of ordinary life become more and more precious to me as I realize they are filling in the pockets between big life events.
How are you delighting in ordinary life right now? How are you frustrated by it? What do you notice in this particular season? How do you want to embrace ordinary days?
I hope these ponderings inspire thought-provoking ideas for you this week.
Your Friend,
Ashley
